Breaking down holiday stress and advice from a local Neurologist

ST. JOSEPH COUNTY, Ind. -- According to a poll from the American Psychiatric Association, Americans are more anxious this year about the holidays compared to last year.

Paula Toth-Russell, M.D., a Neurologist with Saint Joseph Medical Group, says every year, we have increased expectations. She says our expectations of Christmas stem from when we were children.

“And then as adults, we continue to foster that and want to do everything for our families, you know, like we had when we were kids. And so, that starts to almost bring in unrealistic expectations of what Christmas should be. So, you know, as time goes on, we all just have increasing responsibilities, increasing things that we feel we need to do, and it just becomes more stressful for everybody,” said Toth-Russell.

Dr. Toth-Russell says this time of year; we are often preoccupied with smaller details.

“When an additional stress comes in that you didn't expect, we just have to kind of reset all of our priorities, and so that just increasingly leads to more stress and feeling like an inability to accomplish those goals that we had so rigorously set out. So that can manifest as suddenly feeling overwhelmed," said Toth-Russell.

She says when you feel overwhelmed, you might experience physical symptoms like a rapid heart rate, headache, or irritability.

Here’s her advice for regulating increased stress.

“One good thing is just to take a step back. You know, you can find yourself in the fray. You can be pushed, pulled, you know, asked to do this, have to try to manage that small crisis. Have to try to make sure that this person is, you know, having a good time,” said Toth-Russell. “You have to just kind of pull back and recenter yourself and then, kind of get on with the priorities of where you should be. And really, an important thing all through the holidays is to do that, to have self-care, to take time for yourself, to sit down, sit by your tree with a cup of tea, cup of eggnog, you know, and just really relax and enjoy the season for yourself. Because the more you become flustered, the worse it is for you and for everybody else.”

While many enjoy being with family and friends, Toth-Russell says it can sometimes be a double-edged sword.
“As much as you really enjoy being with family and friends, it can also be a very anxiety-provoking issue. You know, for instance, politics might come up, some conversation —uncomfortable might come up, some family members or friends that just kind of rub you the wrong way. You have to almost anticipate those things, and it's not going to be perfect. So, you simply have to not engage, maybe just pull back and allow the time to go and not get caught in the mire of it,” said Toth-Russell.

Toth-Russell also mentions a method of self-care that can help others, too--by way of reaching out to people who might be lonely or not as invested in holiday gatherings.

"One thing about self-care is that understanding that giving of yourself, even a phone call or a letter or, you know, stopping by to say hello, is really an important thing, not only for that person, but also, it helps you really realize what the season is all about,” said Toth-Russell.